"Hey, Nice Apparatus!" and Other Ramblings - A Gnome Guide

[Kiffles]

"Hey, Nice Apparatus!"
And Other Ramblings: A Gnome Guide

A very decent portion of this guide is straight facts that I read over from WoWwiki or have picked up here and there. However, there are some things I've made educated guesses on to the best of my abilities, based upon facts, such as specific aspects in culture. This is by no means a complete guide as of yet -- I'd like to see if you guys have anything you'd like to know about or want to see added! If I missed anything, if you have any questions, or links that might be useful, post them here and I'd be happy to answer or add to the guide as needed!

That being said, let's get to it, shall we?

Appearance

Gnomes are by far one of the shortest sentient races in all of Azeroth -- that goes without saying, of course. Gnomish males can reach a titanic height of around 3 feet even, while females stand around a whopping 2'10"! Their weight, on the other hand, compliments their height by being around 42 - 45lbs. for the men, 37 - 39lbs. for the womenfolk.

Their builds tend to lean towards the more...well, lean. At least, by Gnomish standards. Hours spent tinkering away and lifting heavy machinery have probably left less time paying much mind to eating a lot, and more time spent building a little muscle from laying down elbow grease. I've little doubt their weight can vary depending on what they do - mages might tend to be a little pudgier from working on magic instead of excessive training in weaponry and melee combat that warriors might endure. Likewise, we can assume that some warlocks might be skinnier due to exposure to Fel magic. Of course, it's not just limited to these variables. When writing a profile, adjust weight for your little Gnome according to their history and habits!

Overall, Gnomes somewhat resemble their Dwarven cousins. Several of their traits, however, vary them greatly - they have stumpy limbs, nimble little fingers (four of each, to be exact!) and stubbly toes, round ears and one of the bigger cranium circumferences out of the Azerothian races. As far as hair on those noggins, colors can range from browns, blondes and blacks, to pinks and greens. It is not uncommon for Gnomes to let their hair grow, and because of this, a lot of the men run around with beards and mustaches, whereas the females will usually have longer hair that they put up through plaiting, pigtails, or even beehives. Their skin tones can be pale, tanned or ruddy and their eyes can vary in general colors such as blue, brown and green to gray, or even violet. Some Gnomes might even have freckles, just to add to the adorable factor!

Gnomish ages nearly double that of Human ages. While the new age of adulthood on the server is 18, originally Gnomes reached adulthood at around 40. 100 is considered middle age, and 150 is old age. Gnomes generally live to be around 200 years old, though some very rare cases have been known to live up to 500.


There are also a few different Gnome races that, while still unplayable, deserve at least a passing mention:

+ Leper Gnomes - During the fall of Gnomeregan, some of the citizens who were trapped in the city survived. However, radiation and poisoning have turned them into lepers. Easily recognizable as such by their green skin and cataracts over their eyes, leaving them with poor eyesight. The radiation has also effected their minds, pushing most all lepers into insanity. Currently, there is no cure for their leprosy, although several individuals have been working to find a cure.

+ Sand Gnomes - Little is known about Sand Gnome culture. For a time they were doubted to have even existed, but confirmed sightings prove that this is not the case. Several are known to live in the Bone Wastes of Terokkar Forest. They are most certainly not as intellectual as their Gnomeregan cousins, living through a tribal society and lacking in proper eloquence ("AHHHH-YAAA-YAAA-YAAA!!!") and social skills with other races. They have been known to be hostile through past encounters.

+ Mechagnomes - There have been stories that the pink, fleshy Gnomes we know and love today once used to be robots, created by the Titans along with the Dwarves and Troggs. They became Gnomes through the Curse of Flesh. They are immortal, but not invulnerable. Like any robots, they require repairs when they malfunction. Their purpose and reason for creation is currently unknown.

History

Not many know of Gnomish history before being discovered by Dwarves -- even the Gnomes themselves. Prior to the Second War, not many records have been kept about their interaction with other races, although there are a few that state interactions with Humans and High Elves as early as 848 years prior to the Burning Crusade.

Through word of a Mechagnome in Northrend known as Gearmaster Mechazod, it is believed that the first existing Gnomes were Mechagnomes, and that they were effected (or afflicted, depending on your views) by the Curse of Flesh. This caused gradual evolution from the Mechagnomes into the fleshy pink versions that exist currently.

Dwarves were known to first interact with Gnomes a little over 200 years before the Burning Crusade, when a Dwarven explorer stumbled upon a small Gnomish village. Astounded by the Gnomes' progression with technology, far surpassing the Dwarves (who had just discovered gunpowder at the time), the two races kept in contact, quickly becoming allies. Eventually the Dwarves would allow the Gnomes to build their capital city of Gnomeregan, an underground techno-city deep within the foothills of Dun Morogh. In exchange, the Gnomes have shared their technology with the Dwarves for many years. Because of this, a lot of Dwarven weaponry and vehicles have been heavily influenced by Gnomish design.

Gnomes have been present long enough to have served during the Second and Third Wars. However, Gnomes only heavily participated in the Second War. Though their designs for weaponry and vehicles helped greatly during the Third War, the Gnomes withheld their troops from going off to fight. Their reason for sudden withdrawal would soon be revealed after the end of the Third War.

The vicious Troggs had invaded Gnomeregan, spreading panic throughout the city. Seeing as their allies had been off fighting the Third War when the invasion began, the Gnomes decided to fight against the Troggs alone.

Tricked by the sinister traitor known as Sicco Thermaplugg, the Gnomes believed that his plan of creating bombs and radiation to destroy the rocky pests would be a success. Little did they know that the explosions and poison gas would not only have little effect on the Troggs, but it would also cause immense casualties among the Gnomish race. Nearly eighty percent of its inhabitants were killed off during this tragic event, the survivors fleeing the city with the High Tinker Gelbin Mekkatorque. At a loss of family, friends, inventions and their home, the Gnomes sought solace in their Dwarven cousins, who allowed them to stay in Ironforge. There they have lived for over a decade in a subsection of Ironforge known as Tinker Town. In recent history, Gnomes have begun to spread out and set up encampments throughout the world, fighting for several causes and working once again alongside the Alliance.

It is a known fact that Gnomes once practiced monarchy as a form of government. However, the Gnomish race has not had a proper king or queen in over 400 years. Current days see the hierarchy being fleshed out through the very core of Gnomish culture -- technology. To put it shortly, the Gnome who can create the best invention is deemed the one who will rule over their people. Case in point: Gelbin Mekkatorque. He was appointed the position of High Tinker because of his brilliant mind in engineering, just leadership skills, and hard work on the construction of the Deeprun Tram. The position of High Tinker is the highest title one can achieve in Gnomish society. It is a position decided through election by the Council of Tinkers and can be held for set terms of service, after which time they return to the workforce. During their time as High Tinker, however, one is allowed to hold a specific title. Mekkatorque has taken on the title "King of the Gnomes," and has held the position for the past seven to nine years.

For a time, the High Tinker's chief advisor was Sicco Thermaplugg, a Gnome who had been bent all his life on becoming High Tinker and the first true king of Gnomeregan in over 400 years. The Council, however, saw him unfit as a leader and chose Mekkatorque instead. Due to this, he plotted to ruin the image of Mekkatorque as High Tinker by convincing him to set off the radiation bombs that would supposedly rid Gnomeregan of the Troggs. This was only made worse when he even convinced Mekkatorque to open the flood vents so that the radiation could be released into the entire city. With the Gnomeregan Exiles gone, Thermaplugg now rules over the irradiated techno-city and the lepers as the self-proclaimed "King of Gnomeregan."





And as a small summary to perhaps make profile-compiling a bit easier, I've made a small list of the general events that happened that Gnomes played on CotH may have been a part of:

Gnomes discovered by Dwarves: Over 200 years ago. (Only if said Gnome is reeeeally old, though. Highly unlikely.)
Construction of Gnomeregan: ?? years ago. (Chances are that it happened a little while after Gnomes were discovered.)
Second War: Began 27 years ago. (From year 6 to year 8.)
Third War: Began 8 years ago.
Fall of Gnomeregan: 10 years ago.

Culture

It is a well known fact that Gnomish culture is centered around technology and the progression thereof. Several things that happen in everyday Gnomish life are no doubt based off of this lifestyle.

Social life, for example. Gnomes aren't all complete shut-ins, and most likely enjoy showing off their inventions to one another. The majority of their social lives outside of family units most likely start when they attend(ed) the great Learning Halls of Gnomeregan, wherein they study things that range from basic mechanics, to punchcard programming, to specialized classes for vehicular studies, combining magic with mechanics, and so on. They study with several other young Gnomes, most likely until they are nearing the age of adulthood. There is little doubt that socialization with one another is further enhanced with specific clubs both in and out of the academic setting. Mechanostrider racing, piloting flying machines and demolition clubs are just some of the probable organizations that Gnomes might partake in.

When it comes to romance, there is nothing particularly spectacular about their courting habits. (Unless you are/were a part of the GSF, in which case punches were the greatest form of affection, but I digress.) Intelligence is probably a big attraction to Gnomes as opposed to looks (although no one ever said a Gnomette wouldn't swoon for a guy with a sharp looking beard) but they most likely do a lot of the same things that Dwarves and Humans do -- only with a Gnomish twist to them. Instead of flowers, maybe a Gnome boy will give the girl he likes something that will be useful to her in an invention she's working on. Dates might be spent comparing blueprints over a mug of ale and assisting one another with engineering work. Other than that, they probably practice the same habits such as kissing (or rubbing noses, if you're hardkorr noam enthuziest frum way bak lol), holding hands, hugs and all that mushy cuteness. Marriage isn't all that uncommon for Gnomes, as well. It's cute to think that a couple might make the wedding rings for one another.

Their reproduction is also the same as any other race. No petri dish babies, unfortunately. Sexuality in and of itself is something that Gnomes are a little more open to, and there have been extremely rare cases of Gnomes falling in love with someone from a different race, or vice-versa, but that's not to say that they'll fall for a Draenei or an Orc. It just means that they might be a little more adventurous, have multiple partners, so on and so forth. If anything, I'd imagine Dwarf/Gnome pairs to be the most common of the unusual matches. With the loss of over eighty percent of their race, however, Gnomes are probably trying to chase after one another overall, rather than other races.

...And then come the babies. Gnomish families can get rather extensive, and it's not a rare practice for parents to have more than three children. That being said, there are cases where parents will only have one or two children to a family. This can lead to several aunts, uncles and cousins. A Gnomish child will usually be brought up bearing the last name of his or her family or an ancestor until they reach age 40. During that time, a Gnome is expected to have at least made one great invention for themselves, and they will usually take the name of that invention as their last name.





When it comes to interactions with other races, Gnomes are considered to be the most eccentric and curious of the races to meet. How do they feel about other races, though? I've compiled a small list of other races and the way that an average Gnome would most likely react to them.

Dwarves - The Dwarves took the Gnomeregan Exiles in and gave them shelter. Gnomes are very close to their Dwarven cousins (if not indebted to them) and have been for many years.

Humans - For the most part, Gnomes and Humans are on good terms with one another. Aside from the short jokes, the Gnomes gave them technology to fight with in both the Second and Third Wars.

Night Elves - There is probably a certain amount of distrust amongst the NElves for Gnomes. The Elves don't want the Gnomes mining up things from the earth, cutting down trees and leveling hills, and although there have been cases of Gnomes spotted in Kal'dorei lands, it's probably the last place a lot of them would be seen.

Draenei - Gnomes probably get along well enough with Draenei, as both seem to be technology-savvy. Otherwise, more short jokes.

Orcs and Trolls - They're two of the core races for the Horde. Gnomes have fought with them for so long alongside the Alliance that it wouldn't be surprising if the Gnomes still hold slight racist views on them.

Tauren - Most likely wouldn't like each other due, again, to nature reasons similar to issues that NElves have.

Forsaken - It...wouldn't be room for a friendship, most likely. Both due to the stigma attached to the Undead as a whole, and because they are a part of the Horde.

Blood Elves - Gnomes have a deep mistrust for High Elves, and that has carried through to Blood Elves as well.

Goblins - There is a rivalry between the Gnomes and Goblins that can range from friendly competition to vicious fighting. Both races compete to see who can create better machines, explosives and vehicles. The Gnomes definitely trust their technology over Goblin technology any day.

Religion for Gnomes is not a big thing. Due to being so scientific, a lot of Gnomes don't believe in any form of religion. There are very few cases where Gnomes may have been influenced by Dwarf religion and believe in the Light, but those cases are far and few between.

Classes and IC Skills

So, you're ready to make your Gnome! (If you haven't already.) But maybe you're still a little stumpulated on what to make them. Well, let's break it down to the basic classes, go over some of their IC skills and racial traits, and cover a few more ideas that might help inspire you to make a Gnomie you can call your very own.

Warrior: Not only were guards ever present before Gnomeregan fell to Thermaplugg, but the High Tinker himself has his own army. That being the case, warriors and fighters definitely play a big role in Gnomish society. While some fighters stay consistent with the ever present "sword and board" theory, well...they're Gnomes. Of course they're going to find other modes of combat. There's little doubt that some fighters have cooked up inventions to help them in battle. That being said, warrior is a much broader class than one might think. Heck, I've even seen some badass Gnomes who fight with their bare fists! Just keep in mind that Gnomes can definitely be strong, but their stature makes said strength limited in comparison to, say, Orcs and Draenei.

Mage: Probably one of the more popular things that wee Gnomies grow up to be, mages have been believed to have been a part of Gnomish society for quite a long time. Due to their high intelligence and inherent curiosity, Gnomes make excellent mages. For them, technology can be beefed out even more by magical means, such as enchantment or installing mana gems into a device. Some even take it a step further by becoming technomages*, seeking new, fantastic ways to combine both magic and technology.

Rogue: On one hand, Gnomes are tiny, and as such, they can be very agile and fast. On the other hand, they've lost family and friends in the past decade, lost their city, and a lot of them might have trouble integrating into other societies. Sounds like the perfect recipe for a rogue, don't it? Other careers such as demolitions, working with illegal contraptions, even sappers* and bombardiers* fit the rogue class nicely.

Warlock: Those who seek darker, more powerful means of magic turn to warlockery -- Gnomes are no exception. Although one of the rarer pursuits for Gnomes, again, due to their brilliance, it's no surprise that they can become some mean warlocks.

*Good prestige classes for Gnomes are, but not limited to: Steam Warrior, Ace, Gunman, Technomage, Bombardier, and Sapper.

Or maybe fighting isn't your thing? Well there are plenty of other things that Gnomes can do! For example, I've rolled a Gnomish doctor who treats her patients with awesome (read: scary) gadgets. I've seen reporters, chefs, demolitionists. A Gnome could basically be anything, so long as it fits the race and lore.

Omake!

Still need some convincing? Here are some inspirationally badass machinima and illustrations of our beloved, short little tech-savvy Gnomes.

Snacky's Journal -

Spoiler:

Part 1

Gnomeregan Teaser -

Spoiler:

X

The Hunt: Trailer -

Spoiler:

X

Gnome warlock about to cook a brutha.
Gnome rogue in the snow.
I don't know. I'm pretty scared.
Gnome warlock at work.
Chromie in the most awesome disguise ever.

In conclusion...

...Gnomes can definitely be considered one of the more eccentric and intriguing races that WoW offers as a playable race. When it comes right down to it, Gnomes can fight as valiantly as any Alliance knight, or be as deadly as any Horde assassin. They've gone through their own share of both physical and mental torment, which can make for some incredibly in-depth RP at times. They're not the stereotypical pretty that NElves and Draenei are, and not as normal as Humans, but that's what makes them such a great race in the first place! They're different. So, the next time you're itching for some variety in your role-play experience, roll a Gnome. You might be pleasantly surprised.

[Kretol]

... this... is seriously awesome. Well done!

[Loxmardin]

Indeed... This is brilliant.

[Thoradin]

Never have I been convinced to create a Gnome. Nicely done. Awesome guide thing too.

[Terant]

This is one of the few guides I've ACTUALLY been able to read start to finish, rather than just skimming through it.

When it comes to romance, there is nothing particularly spectacular about their courting habits. (Unless you are/were a part of the GSF, in which case punches were the greatest form of affection, but I digress.)

...I thought feeding someone's candy addiction was the greatest form of affection for the GSF! What happened to that?!

[Kiffles]

The candy is false affection shhhh. Once they're swooned over with candy, then you throw the punches.

[therew]

Informative and fun to read. I have a gnome character that I put on a shelf for a while, will give this another read over before I bring her back. So on a personal level, thanks.

[Gyran]

Best guide ever! GSF Gnomes also used to treat their weapons like their best friends. Truly we are a screwy bunch.

[Beltharean]

(four of each, to be exact!)

Actually, Gnomes have five toes surprisingly...

Aside from that, you know I love it, haha. One (very) small step for Gnome, one slightly larger step for Gnome-kind.

[Terant]

Best guide ever! GSF Gnomes also used to treat their weapons like their best friends. Truly we are a screwy bunch.

"A pistol has the same amount of feelings as a steam suit!"

[Kiffles]

Actually, Gnomes have five toes surprisingly...

Easily fixed. x)

"A pistol has the same amount of feelings as a steam suit!"

You kidding? Babs is still trying to find a way to feed her flying machine.

[Anski]

Excellent guide, Kiffles.

[Harmonic]

Must... roll... SANDGNOME

[Beltharean]

Must... roll... SANDGNOME

You have no idea how much I hope you're serious.

[Harmonic]

I'm so serious, that you should expect to see one tomorrow hangin' around Booty Bay. He's property though. Heh.